Opinion: The Toilet Downstairs

Gy and I are currently renovating our house. It's an ancient 30-year old double-storey house, complete with damp patches on the wall, and dubious wiring that crisscrosses the ceiling. 

So after much discussion, we decided ˆnotˆ to have a washroom downstairs. 

That decision unexpectedly opened up a whole can of worms. Friends have gasped, relatives have tut-tutted, parents have painted a million possible outcomes - all deliriously dire. While opinions are free, these people have not had the decency to check with us why we chose not to have the jamban in the first place. Immediate responses have been the what-were-you-thinking? looks mostly. Even my mom predicted that I would regret this decision forever and ever. 

God, it's only a stinking toilet. I know that it may not be convenient for people who come to visit, but I totally do not see the rationale in carving out a 3' by 3' space for the convenience of people who step into my house probably less than 5% of the hours in a year. It makes no sense. And just because everyone has a bathroom downstairs does not make it the best option in the world. That is sucky reasoning, if you ask me.

That is pretty much the state of mind most of us are in. Just because it is, therefore it is good. Poppycock.

Take for example the institutions and rites society has imposed upon us. A wedding should entail a diamond ring, a pre-wedding photo shoot, a lavish dinner, a do-everything-and-anything-to-please-our-parents-and-relatives attitude and kazaam! - it's nearly perfect. How about the very basic thought that a marriage joins 2 persons who are madly in love into one. Who gives a fink about how this union should be celebrated? Would I care if picking up my bride in an Iswara will start the in-laws tongues a-wagging? I don't. Would I care if the wedding date is not predestined by the celestial charts? I don't. Would I care if all my relatives are not invited for my wedding? Screw it. I don't. I only care about 'US'. 

I used to think that weddings are a big show-off parade for the Chinese. A Malay friend recently mentioned how much is spent on building the grandest pelamin ever, as that would be the yardstick of wealth. What a sour taste in the mouth that leaves. A wedding celebrates the love of the newlyweds, and here you have parents wanting to outdo one another for apparently ill-advised reasons in the first place.

Why place such a premium on what people think? The more we try to meet society's demands, the more disappointed we will be with ourselves. Life is short. Set your own goals, set your own dreams and achieve them. 

What am I gonna do about my toilet? If my friends come a-visiting and they cannot find the will to walk 12 steps to the toilet upstairs, they are welcome to pee at the backyard. And they will probably never be invited back.

Stupid societies breed stupid people. I'd rather be the odd one out, thankyouverymuch.